and thank you for your smile today

HELLO

So it was 5 p.m. after college hours.
Met up with my friend there and I saw you on the backside, joking with your friend.

I should have forget it from long time ago, but,
Rush-rush-rush. I'm in the mood of rush.
This eyes just focused on you, while I was hidding behind my friends.
and, oh - you smile, with her again.

I was trying to let it go by joining their (my friends) joke whatever it was so cruel like 'lifting your friend as a cow then throw it away'. CRUEL.
Pretending not seeing you there.
But you came here, closely. Speaking with my friend.
First we're just talking as usual and joking of course.
Then you asked me,

" Are you not in the mood ? What happened ? Tell me, haha. Hey, I'm serious. "

I saw deeply into your eyes, I wanna say " It's because of you, stupid ! " but I realize that is a very bad idea to do.

" No, I'm just in a rush mood, " I throw my sight out.
" I think I'm kind enough for asking you but you ignore me like this. ckckck "

Then he talked with my friend about something freak and funny about a girl that made me laugh out loud.
So he said,

" Hey, you're laugh afterall. So we (he & my friend) are successfully for turn your mood good again, "
He smiled.

***

So it was evening and would be raining.
But it doesn't matter,
and thank you for your smile today.

p.s. you can guess, is it trully happened or just in my imagination :p

You're gonna be okay, you're not that weak

HELLO

First of December, 2009.

Most of you were waiting for December coming.
Yes, you've said it everywhere, on Twitter, Facebook, Plurk, etc. Even you weren't say it, I think you'll say 'yes' for the first statement.

Why waiting for December ?

Me, included to a person who isn't pay much attention of 'What month is it ?' or 'Is it already December ?' and so on.
Maybe December has it own speciality for some people, May-be.
But after people mentioned #decemberwish on their Twitter just now, something came up in my mind.

What is December for me ?

My December was welcoming by rain.
Yeah. Rain (for wheater) and 'rain' (reflection of the day).
I'm not talking about love.
...okay. Yes, I got a bad mark again, twice. Now is Calculus turn.
Not as bad as Physics last exam, but yeah you-know-that.
Do you feel bored if I'm talking about my mark again ? Hope you're not. I'm in a rush mood now. Absolutely.
(I don't know people whom I must discuss with, so here the top. You're my blog, right ? And I'm freely doing what i gotta do. )
My besties here got perfect score, 100 - 96 - 80-etc. They're great, They got their best try.


*Take a breath*

How December make my rainy day ?

With blank and unconditional mind after that, sentence like " Come on, Sasri. Cheer up, you'll do better next ! " or " This is not the end of your journey, you still have Final Exam ! " until the most unhelped one, " You must learn harder, " aren't help at all.
And it was rain that evening. Cold and dark.
Fulfilled by worried thingy, complicated, and rush.
Until I saw a tweet on my timeline, form TheHeartBox.
" You're gonna be okay, you're not that weak. "
...and sure,
It successfully flipped my mood.
So-What ?
I'm gonna be okay, because I'm not that weak.
I won't be broke by thingy like this.
Have I ever said that " It's not how much you've ever failed, but how much you get up and try again. " ?
Yes, I'm not that weak.
I'm not that weak.
I'm gonna be okay.
I'm gonna be okay.
I'm gonna be okay !

p.s. At least, December have it own meaning for me, now.

Symphonesia 2009 !

Monday, 9th November 2009 03:00 am

HELLO

so it was aaaw-some !
Started at 01.00 p.m. until 01.00 a.m. in Sasana Budaya Ganesha, with thousands people there.
A little bit regret because I was comin' late so I missed Endah 'n Rhesa performance *grrr Marching Band practice*
Then I went there with Sandy, Iqbal, Otum, and the others FTSL guys. Yeah, I'm the only girl (again) and the missing one. Most of my girl friends didn't come or they came with their boyfriend *uhuk jealous uhuk*. So there I was, pretending like a boy while hanging out with them.
Err. I miss my girl side. LOL

ASEAN Culture Performance, Angsa Srigala, Endah 'n Rhesa, Efek Rumah Kaca, The S.I.G.I.T, Ecoutez !, Maliq and D'essentials, and Glenn Fredly as closing, I think paying Rp 52.500 for the Symphonesia 2009 ticket is worth enough.
Sing all along the performance and take a lot of pictures.
And you know what - almost the song here was all about love. I mean sadlovestories, brokenhearted, complicated, bla bla sad mode : on.
Single people shooted !
Okay, I'm in.

Overall, Symphonesia 2009 was great, and I'd love to come again next year. hehe :)
And here is some pictures. Sorry, no pictures about us because the camera battery was exhausted. gezz


Guitarist from Ecoutez !


Glenn Fredly


Maliq and D'essentials


Ecoutez !


The S.I.G.I.T

p.s. Oh yeah, I wore a skirt there, count me in :p

When I Got A Bad Mark

Monday, 9th November 2009 22.31

HELLO

Calm, I'm not going to write about love.
So, you won't able to read melancholic-sentimental-dramatic post now.
Want to share college-peeps-thinking when they are in the first semester and got a bad mark for their first midtest.
Uh-I mean, me.

When I was in highschool, got a bad mark was usual. Not very bad but It wasn't a great mark to share with your friends. I never got excellent mark (100 pure) for all of my test.
Then I was trying to repair it.
The result ? Good enough.

After that, I entered college life, here, ITB. School of Electrical Engineering and Informatic.
Almost people with over-capacity of their brains ARE THERE.
In the other words, ex-all kinds of olympiad members or genius people who wrote mathematic book in 3 LANGUAGES when he was in highschool, or the subscribers of 'A' mark in every test.
(Wth with this faculty ?? )

Me ? Don't ask.

I know they (we called 'them' as 'God of STEI' or 'Dewa STEI') had work-so-hard in the past to reach it.
I know I haven't show my best try -even I don't know how to show it.
And I prefer to prior my non-academic activities, so I lost the important ones.

I got a bad mark on Physics midtest.
Seriously, BAD.
The worst mark I ever received.

I'm not cry or regret for it, I know from the first I took wrong strategy.
For a moment, reaching my target (IP > 3,5 at first semester) is still far away, but there's a chance on second midtest 3 weeks again.
It won't easy, but I-will-try.

No, I won't change into Study Oriented Person, but re-organize my activity and give more times to study. Pray too.

Would you wish me luck ?
Thank you.
Wish you get success too then,

p.s. no tears just fight !

Before you've entered finish line, you should be never give up.

HELLO

November 2nd 2009, 01:37
Waking up after stayed away too late. Rushing my imagination and tearing some midnight snack to start writing this post. Oreo Soft Cake looks better.
Oh, Non sense, I think.

So, me. staring in front of you. When I wrote this post, people around me was exploring their own imagination dreamworld.
Oh, wait, there's a boy next to my room playing his guitar and singing a catchy song. Maybe I should asked him what's the title of the song. At least I know that I'm not the only me who's still wake up in here.

Wait a minute.

Okay I'm back.

I don't even realize that for my last 2 post was talking about-uh-love ? Something that I rarely wrote for about 2 years blogging ( I started it on October 2007).
Weird. What things that makes me turn to a-melodic-drama-queen like this ? Arrgh no, I don't like it.

Bzzt. ITunes playing songs that refers me to someone I've thinked for sometime ago. Even shuffle mode can read what I'm thinking now.
And I still remember your face and expression when we-Stop, You're so-Oh, Stop. Please. Don't.
Be ready to find sentimental girl after this.

I want to talk with myself, my own ego and sarkatism side. Let myself not to postpoe works I've should done before. Warn my own ego not too obsessed with him. Asking my sarkatism side to do sarkatism things (Okay, I'm joking).
Seriously, I'm threating with 'Galau Syndrome' for now.
Social networking also be my victims, but, nah, I prefer to writing about mylife here than Twitter or Facebook.

About my lasr post, I told you that I hate for being A Secret Admirer. Why ? It just turns you into a tiredness and hopeless.
Hey, don't judge me that I just can say the words. I've ever be a Secret Admirer before, 3 years ago for about 1 years, and I'm doing nothing.
Yep. Nothing. Just staring from a distance and go out with someone else I didn't love, It was nothing.
That was a main reason why I don't want to be A Secret Admirer (again). Useless and dissapointing.

Let's try frontal way.
Like a music, like your life.
Listening what you want to listen, Living what you want to live.
If you love someone, then don't just sit, wait, and hope like she/he would come to you.
Even you have no brave to say it out loud that you are falling with them, then try to get closer with.
Is it happy for being around with someone we loved ? Absolutely.
Yeah, I can see your cheesy smile when you're imagine it.

What's the point afterall ?
Before you've entered finish line, you should be never give up.

Oh, right. I'm feels like I'm a Love Consultant now -weird.
Then I want to ended this post.

p.s. I hate this virus.

I hate for being a Secret Admirer

HELLO

I wanna see my expression while i wrote this post. Contrary to the fact that I don't know how can I express my feeling know. Happy ? Maybe. Sad ? Not wrong.

Oh, You need flashback ? Go on. No need ? Then go.

Last Saturday night was awesome ! Hanging out with 7 Pom - Pom Boys (Arif, Nunu, Dipil, Ryan, Otum, Kiky, Yanu ) and my girls (Ulfi and Tyas) who are very very BRUTAL ! haha

We went to NAV Karaoke at Ciwalk and spending time there for about 2 hours. We were addicted with a virus called craziness. We sang along with our choice songs and most of the songs are 'Broken-Hearted Song' which refers to our love situation that time.
Complicated Love Life *sigh*.

But I really enjoyed it, all things related to 'Stress High Stadium' was gone. We laugh over and over, e talked about love and some useful tips to passed it by.
And the most wanted session we never passed : PHOTOSESSION.

We need to go out again next day, I really want to :)













Here they are. Look at those wierd faces. LOL

Ehm, I want to share pics when I had HEDON TIME with Ms. Tata in SourSally PVJ. Great time with her.



Then we'll enter a mellow-drama session. You still read ? Okay.

Seriously, I want to show how happy I am being around you, but then I think " Oh no, just don't. It will be the worst thing I've ever done. "
I know the fact, I know it. I know.
You know it is so-HARD being a person that just can see and wait.

Hell.
ITunes playing 'When You Love Someone' by Endah n Rhesa.

***
I love you but it’s not so easy to make you here with me
I wanna touch and hold you forever
But you’re still in my dream
And I can't stand to wait ‘till nite is coming to my life
But I still have a time to break a silence

When you love someone
just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
when you hold your love
don’t ever let it go
or you will loose your chance
to make your dreams come true.

I used to hide and watch you from a distance and i knew you realized
I was looking for a time to get closer at least to say... “hello”
And I can’t stand to wait your love is coming to my life

***
Shoot !
That represents what I feel now.
Blur. I can't think. Galau.

Maybe what I want to say now is
"I hate for being a Secret Admirer."


p.s. I need some fresh air (again)

We're in the same town but different stories

HELLO

I want to know what's your expression when i'm come back here, writing such an annoyed post that disturbing your sleep, Bloogy ?
Wake up ! Give your total attract for me, your majesty. Oh, you have ? Okay, that's good.
Now can I start my sentences ? Don't be fall a sleep, please.

Bandung is an unpredictable city like I spent my last Saturday and Sunday Nite with my new friends, my homeboys pom - pom boys. You're rockin' awesome, you've made it ! I can laugh afterall i spent my time with you all, sillys. Thank you, sick ! hahaha

Bandung also an unpredictable stories, especially for love stories.
' We're in the same town but different stories. '
The special tagline I've made for describe what i feel now. Classy, but naturally.

As through I met some friends, almost are in a relathionship status, which mean they are taken. Most of them passing through Long Distance Relationship or we called LDR (and most of them have same shape : Jakarta - Bandung Relationship). And some of their relationship just start to be broken.
I've seen how it happened, and why ? Because they are not ready to start Long Distance Relationship or the other factors ( read : new people zz )
I'm here not to critic or insult you who is reading my post and maybe have the same thing like what i said before, okay. I'm sorry.

What ? Nah, I'm not interested on starting Long Distance Relationship, seriously I won't.
I ended my last relationship because I don't want to get include LDR in my life.
You told me that I'm a coward ? Whatever you said, I-don't-care Baby.

Beside all of many LDR problems, I prefer to pass Close Distance Relationship ( weird ? yeah it is)
In the same town, in the same place, in the same college.
We're in the same town, no matter it was.

But, what i feel now is still too far than i admired.
People I interested in has his own life, his own stories. Sometimes I don't know that does he okay there ? Are you okay with your girlfriend ?

Though,
We're in the same town but different stories.
Kita satu kota beda cerita.
It is just same with Long Distance Relationship.
Then, which one better ?


p.s. Put your smile again on your face, nah, that's looks better, boy.

i'm fine :)

HELLO

for the times i left you cold,
i just can say 'sorry'.

so, whats up people in here ?
i really miss my blogging time ! one month (or more) had no touch with this blog just feel like wierd here.
oh, last September 29th 2009 i had my 18th birthday !
happy birthday to me. hha
okay then.
you want a quick update ?

almost 2 months i live in Bandung.
enjoying college life here,
study in groups together,
tasting new food in each cafetaria,
stress about UTS (d'oh) every friday,
spending time with besties,
hanging out with new people,
joining Marching Band and Colour Guard practices,
joining PSB-ITB as stage division,
and the most thing i like is be a part of ITB Fair 2010 as performance division.

it's FUN although makes me tired.
i'm fine here. i'm very very fine :)

but kinda times, i miss my family.
i miss my besties, oldfriends outta there.

what i've gonna do just open my laptop and see all of their pictures.
i miss them.
a lots.

p.s. i really get into him now, college homeboy ! hhe :)

colour guard

HELLO !

090909 !
what's everybody doin' here ?
then i'll say again that because of connection problem in my kos so i couldn't recently update in here.
big sorry :(

just small updates here,
so i've joined 2 major units in my college that is MBWG (Marching Band Waditra Ganesha) and KPA (Keluarga Paduan Angklung).

especially for the first one,
Marching Band is one of my dream activity ( through in my school before there isn't )
so i'm very happy & interest about MBWG ! hehe
the position i wanted most is Colour Guard or we short it CG.
it called for the person ( almost the member are girls) that place as flag spinning and dancing in Marching Band so they make it more interesting and colourful.


Colour Guard

so, in the MBWG trial-test yesterday i've done my best in CG trial-test.
spinning a flag is a little bit hard to do but it's so much fun.
then the result was, I GOT IT ! yeeaaay *lebay* hehe
i can't wait for CG first practice !

enough then, wait for next updates ! hhe

p.s. my body is not delicious today, hukhuk :(

get ready for college life, college girl.

HELLO

i'll say BIG SORRY again for left you cold my bloggy.
in my place there's a problem with internet connection so i must take a walk to warnet if i wanted to go online.
what a mess :(

so, here i am.
starting a new life in Bandung for a college life. get ready college girl. uhm
stay in a place named KOS-KOSAN (i dunno the english name-zz) push me to be an independent girl.
i go everywhere by myself, by public transportation or take a walk.
buy or make breakfast, lunch, dinner by myself.
doing all things by myself.
seems pretty hard but i'm sure it will be nice then.

almost 2 weeks since i have arrived here.
first week fulfilled with : registration, fixed the kosan and ospek.

ospek (in ITB called PRO-KM) was amazing !
the opening is absolutely great, performing colaboration from many units.
we divided into some groups.
i got 114 group, consist 16 people with only 5 girls from different faculty. (which are damn sick and crazyyyyy ! )
the taplok (senior) were ka devi and ka picul.
we're doing great things like : seminar, making posters, making diary, senam geje, chitchatfoe, photoshoot, and sooo many things that will be usefull for us.
(yeaa, there's still 'creepy things' from senior but it doesn't matter) hehe
we built our togetherness in ITB.

then next week, college life.
yeaa, i started it on 18 August 2009.
as you think, college is different from school. but it's fun ! :)
many friends from different region, many types of dosen, many interesting people to meet. haha
i got a looooots of friends here.
they're nice and easygoing. i love that.

for the units, i choose MBWG (marching band waditra ganesha) as my main priority !
i don't know why, i like it. hehe
and i must try hard to be colour guard, my favorite position. hehe

in the back side,
i miss yeeeeeu all my family, my bestfriends, my gossipas, my sillypadepokan, my dancers, all alll !
in this month my daddy and my bestie (mbex) have their birthday and i'm not include there.
zzz i don't know what to write next.

i think it's the most complicated post i ever write,
guess why ?

p.s. this is ramadhan month, happy fasting all. i'm sorry for all mistakes.